It's official. I am without a doubt the most delusional, irrational, unrealistic human being on the face of this planet!
Hopefully-soon-to-be-in-this-decade-mf***-sob-ex-husband continues to astound me with his divorce treachery. My lawyer formally requested lots of financial info from dickhead. Dickhead's attorney wants my financial stuff (as expected) but also a complete list of anyone and where (other than dickhead) I have had sexual intercourse, oral sex, fondled, or been otherwise stimulated since 1996. My phone records. My credit card bills. What the fuck is that about? No big secret I had an affair. No big secret I started seeing someone months after we separated. So this sorry excuse for a husband is going to drag the mother of his children through the mud in this little podunk hometown of his. He's not squeaky clean. His glass house is going to shatter! I'm seriously considering going through the phone book and start writing down names until the list is about 100 long. Think my lawyer will agree?
Of course, something good comes out of everything. After crying and quaking for two days, the cork popped. The anger and resentment and pain and hurt I felt for the past 24 years but never expressed came out. Spewed out. Venemously. I promised him a court battle like he's never seen before.
His comments: Everyone of the points I drove home - all he could say was I'm so sorry. I'm sorry. BFD. Too little too late. And the stuff his bitch lawyer sent me? It made him sick at his stomach when he read it. Did he tell her not to send it? Noooo. He's without a doubt the laziest, most cowardly male I've ever known. Started to use the word man - but he doesn't deserve that.
Now he wants us to sit down and try to come to an agreement ourselves. And like an absolute idiot, I've agreed. My lawyer is fuming. Thinks dickhead and his lawyer are bullies and is ready to fire back with both barrels. I relayed dickhead's version of his lawyer's visit. My lawyer told me my hubby lies to me a lot. He's pegged him as a controlling bully since the first time he met him. Stupid Queenie told lawyer to hold off until I talk to dickhead.
Meanwhile, grown sons that live with dickhead aren't talking to me. And I finally don't care. Someday hopefully they'll grow up and become men - if their father will ever quit enabling and coddling them.
So much more, but I'll put it in another post. Too many fucked up areas of my life to combine into one blog.
Believe it or not, I feel freer, calmer, and braver than I can ever recall being. I've discovered I can be a tough old broad when I need to.
(And to think even four months I ago I never thought I'd ever say anything bad about dickhead!)
2 comments on It's official
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Good for you for getting to this point! You are one step closer to healing!
The words are flowing and "that kind of language" is what flows. It's good, it really is. (I agree with your lawyer that you should not be meeting or communicating with your husband about the divorce or anything related to it. He can take anything you say...or his interpretation of it...back to his lawyer and use it in their tactics to fight you. Communication on this subject should be with and through the lawyers only.)